|Patiently waiting for Dan's class to perform, this was two or three classes before his.|
I watched performance after performance and then, finally, Dan's class was next. There I was, camera in hand, positioned motionless so I could capture the perfect shot the moment he hit the stage. My Dan is a ball of energy that jumps, runs, and fidgets at every moment. Many of my pictures of him are mere blurs so this preparation was quite calculated. I figured I would be able to get at least one good picture of him for me, and yes, Facebook.
|Dan's class, sans Dan. You can see a little glimpse of the kids dressed as trains.|
I couldn't understand it. Did I miscalculate? Was his class actually the next one to perform? Was he so well disguised that I had missed him? Didn't I see his class heading to the stage? Then I spotted him with his paraprofessional (para), heading back down off the platform. My heart sank. I knew something must have gone awry. I silently started to cry as the music started playing for the next act. Tears rolling down, I started to get in my head, "couldn't his para handle him?" I thought. "This is a special school, aren't they supposed to be able to deal with kids that have sensory issues and are hyper?" The show was not over but I just wanted to leave. I thought of how I could make a grand exit to show how pissed I was and then write an angry e-mail to his teacher about how they broke a mother's heart.
|Photo courtesy of http://shu-media.co.uk|
Then I realized, "of course! Dan is not a robot!" I can't just press a button and expect him to perform at will. No wonder he ripped that robot costume off! It was his own little performance art piece speaking against the constraints of society. What an extraordinary act of defiance. The boy is genius! Lol.
That act of defiance spoke to me more than the planned performance. No, I have no picture to show off, and I don't have the "he looked so cuuuuute" story to tell my husband. What I do have is a boy who is his own person. A boy, I need to continue accepting and loving for who he is. A boy that teaches me not to be a robot myself, to live my life to the fullest (John 10:10).
|Photo courtesy of Britton Church, http://www.brittonchurch.com|
Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays.