Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Still Musing about Family over the Holidays

I am still excited about my big sister being here from Alabama. I spent the whole of yesterday with her. She came over with the boys, my husband took the older ones out and I stayed home with her and my youngest. When D took his nap, A and I chatted away about our creative endeavors. She makes jewelry and showed me all of her new pieces, I showed her my new fabric cuffs (she also got one for Christmas) and other projects I was working on, it was like a manic show and tell session that had been pent up for a year (I only see her once a year).

Remember, my last post about my youngest being attached to her even though he only saw her once a year? Well, the same thing happened with my oldest and her boys. The minute they got to our house, M turned off the TV (M does not turn off the TV for ANYONE!!!) he went right up to them ,said hello and they went off picking up where they left off last year...wrestling, throwing things across the room, playing race cars. Very intriguing male bonding. That's like another world to me. I grew up with two sisters. I am so girly. I sometimes don't understand why God gave me boys, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I have a Masters in anthropology, it' so exciting to be privy to this secret lives of boys that I never grew up with. My sister and I had a lot to talk about on that topic , too.
Anwway, I am just lost in family musings these days. It's incredibly uplifting, inspiring, intriguing, mystrious. Family can get on your last nerve, yet it is an unbreakable, inexplicable bond. I could be so upset at my sisters or mom after a fight or something but when I am hurting, they are the people I come to first (well, after my hubby, he's family too). I don't think that I am as vulnerable with anyone else as I am with them. That says something.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Sisters together on Christmas

The best part of the holiday season is seeing my sisters. My younger one lives near me but my older one, A, lives in Alabama and I only get to see her once a year. Having both of them here makes me feel complete, we compliment one another so when A comes back home, she brings out and confirms a lot of things about me and who Iam.

D, my youngest, was sick on Christmas and only wanted to be carried by me the whole time which was quite exhausting!!! So when I had to take a bathroom break I gave him to my hubby and he cried bloody murder ( D, not hubby). A was nearby and D reached out towards her and allowed her to hold him as he gently layed his head on her shoulder. When I came out, A motioned to me and whispered, "I think he thinks I am you." We do look a like and have the same kinda voice. That was so interesting to me. The fact that he only sees his aunt once a year and is still drawn to her. It speaks of the power of family and connection. I am still thinking about it.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Monday Inspiration - Fabric Cuffs!

Once again, I am participating with maternalspark.com and writing about inspiration. As I mentioned in an earlier post (November 17), I have been looking for other ways to use fabric, my artistic medium of choice. I love designing clothes and printing on it but I have been wanting to branch out. I bought and took countless books from the library about fabric books, artist trading cards, fabric jewelry, etc. trying to find something that would call to me and I think I found it.....fabric cuffs!!! I have been having so much fun with the few that I have already done. It combines my love of faces (I just can’t get away from that! What can I say, people inspire me), my interest in wearable art, and my desire to use recycled fabric. It is also something I can finish in a small amount of time which gives me a great sense of accomplishment.

I decided to start by making some as gifts. The top and bottom are gifts for my sisters, they each have three kids so I decided to stencil faces of their children onto the cuff. I love stenciled faces and I thought that this would allow for a more artistic interpretation rather than just printing their photos on fabric. I also did one of my favorite people, prominent in my clothing line, Frida Kahlo. I am definitely going to make a lot more of these for my shop. One of my goals for the new year is to offer more variety on my shop in terms of products and sizes, continue working on my designing skills, and update my blog more often. Stay tuned!!!

Monday, December 1, 2008

WORLD AIDS DAY and Monday Inspiration

As usual, I like to join Maternalspark.com in talking about what inspires me. In addition, in honor of World Aids Day, I would like to honor those who are living with Aids a well as those who have passed on from the disease.

Today, in particular, two people that inspire me are my cousin P and my close friend S. Both of these beautiful women lost their parents to Aids at a time in their lives when they needed their parents most. S was raising a budding family and P was just starting on her journey of womanhood. When I think of them, I stand in awe at how they have continued to persevere for themselves and their families. S is a strong woman who is a fighter and refuses to be a victim of her circumstances. She continues to love life and tries to instill that in her children. P has had some set backs but always gets back up and continues to strive. I am so proud of her. I honor you today, S and P, you inspire me to be a strong woman in spite of what may be going on in my life. I am grateful to know you!!!!

Monday, November 24, 2008

Monday inspiration

My husband and I have been having a hard time finding time for a date. We planned something last week and my mom, who was supposed to come over to babysit, cancelled on us. We planned something else on another day and one of the kids got sick. Another time, we realized that we simply had no money to hire a babysitter. It kept going on like this for quite some time that I finally blew up and told him that we needed to get creative if we wanted to go out (okay, I said some more things but I don't want to go into it here). So since going out at night was not working, hubby rearranged his work schedule so that he could work 4PM-12AM, I asked D's physical therapist to arrive half and hour earlier, and we arranged for my mom to watch D while my six year old went to school. Cool! Everything was working as scheduled. The therapist arrived on time, Good. I got a call that M had thrown up all over himself and he needed to be picked up, NOT GOOD. Okay, okay, we can work something out. I called my mom and asked her if it was okay for her to watch two kids instead of one (she said yes, of course, and told me how silly I was for asking, i asks anyway because I want to teach her a lesson about boundaries, but that's for another blog post) and I then tell my husband he needs to pick up M from school. Okay, everything back on track. M gets home and he seems okay. I ask him how he's feeling and he says he's feeling better. I don't ask him twice for fear that he might come down with something at that very second and, even though my mom's home, I would feel guilty leaving her with a sick child. Anyway, M then tells my husband that he has a headache, I pretend not to hear and grab my coat. There is no way in heck that we will not have a date today, darnit!!! So we made it out the door and into the car and off we went. We didn't even do anything ultra special. We had breakfast together and then went to Barnes and Nobles and his favorite, KB Toy Store. Okay, my hubby is a big kid too. It was just great to be with him, alone, and talk. That stirs my creative juices, to feel like an equal in a relationship, to feel like there is a give and take and not just a take which is what happens when you are with needy kids all the time. I also realized today that creativity is not just about putting stuff on paper, on fabric, about making something tangible. It's about making time to be with the one you love. I am inspired today.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Inspiration Monday - Monday's Muse

I am once again joining www.maternalspark.com in sharing what inspires me this Monday. Well, I have been really obsessed with fabric. Yes, fabric. I know that I use fabric all the time when I reconstruct and sew. But lately I have been wanting to do more with all the fabric sraps I have lying around. I love screenprinting faces on fabric which is what my clothing line Nelesc is all about (http://www.nelesc.etsy.com/) but I am interested in doing more. I borrowed Create Your Own Handprinted Cloth by Rayna Gillman, from the library and it has really gotten my wheels turning. I have also been wanting to make fabric books. Recently, I bought Fabric Picture Books by Gwen Marsten. My kids have these amazing fabric books that they love and I would love to custom make one for each of them or even make themed books for grownups. I have so many ideas in my head with so little time. We'll see how I fit it all in my schedule. For now, it's inspiring enough to see, through my books, what other people are doing with fabric.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Julia de Burgos Screenprinted Top

Hello all! Here is my new addition to my etsy shop. It's a new face, Julia de Burgos! De Burgos was born February 17, 1914, is considered by many as the greatest poet to have been born in Puerto Rico and generally considered as one of the greatest poets of Latin America. She was also an advocate for the independence of Puerto Rico and an ardent civil rights activist for women and African/Afro-Caribbean writers. She fits perfectly with the line and I am so glad that I finally added her. Let me know what you think.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008


Yesterday I, and two friends, got up and voted at 6:00 in the morning with a sense of mission and charge. It was exhilarating, exciting, goundbreaking, to be able to vote for someone who signified change and hope. I took a picture near a "vote here" sign because I knew how historic that moment could be. Last night when I heard that Obama won, I was so overwhelmed with emotion. I called my mom, sisters, and anyone else I could get in the line to share the moment with. I felt the need to connect. To be part of something bigger. And I was. I think that was the most exhilarating part, that at that moment, I felt connected to the rest of the country, there by myself in my living room. It's an awesome feeling. I think i see a new image for my clothing line coming on.

Friday, October 31, 2008

New Addition to Nelesc Etsy shop

Here are two new additions to my shop on etsy, http://www.nelesc.etsy.com/. These are sweatshirt jackets made of 2xx sweatshirts I purchased. I love them so much, I kept the first two I made! The grey one has a hood and the blue doesn't. Let me know what you think.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Support Creative Entrepreneurial Women

Our Creative Life is having a link exchange today of women entrepreneurs on her blog. If you are a woman who has her own business, go on over and add your link, but be sure to also leave a comment so that everyone can learn a little about you and your business in return! There are some fascinating women on this exchange, I am proud to be among them!

Visit http://ourcreativelife.blogspot.com/2008/10/support-women-entrepreneurs.html to leave your link and to browse the sites of other creative women.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Angela Davis Hat on Etsy

So here's a new hat I made yesterday that I just posted on my etsy shop. I stitched an image of Angela Davis on the back. I am now addicted to making these. What do you think?

Monday, October 6, 2008

Inspiration Monday

Lately, I have been very much inspired by Fall. I love the changing colors of the leaves, the brisk weather allowing me to wear jackets and hats (I love these!) and the start of the academic year, signifying a new beginning. So in keeping with that, I have begun to make hats out of recycled or, just too small to make anything else, pieces of fabric. It's been fun, a new venture in my sewing and also something I could accomplish in a day. Having an 18 month old, I have had to work in a piece meal manner, doing a little at a time. This is a new way to work for me as I used to have big chunks of time pre-kids. I often get very impatient, not wanting to see the end result over the course of a week, but right now!!! The hats give me that immediate sense of gratification. More to come on my etsy shop!

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Reconstructed Mens Shirt on Etsy shop

Here is my third reconstructed mens shirt. I added puff sleeves and this one has more of a flared waist. I love the way it came out so I decided to add it to my etsy shop, http://www.nelesc.etsy.com/ . I am working on another one for the friend who originally requested one and got me on this journey. What do you think?

Monday, September 22, 2008

Monday Inspiration

I am joining Maternalspark.com in making Monday's post about the topic of inspiration. This weekend I was inspired by one of my son's favorite TV shows, Imagination Movers. "Described as a combination of the Beastie Boys and Fred Rogers, the Movers combine pop and rap music, education and fun in their videos about such child-friendly topics as cleaning up your room, eating right, and being afraid of the dark" (from https://secure.lpb.org/shoplpb/imovers.cfm). I was watching it this saturday with my oldest son, M, on the Disney Playhouse channel when I realized that they don't like to use the word "problem." When they have a "problem", they quickly correct themselves and say, "no, we have an idea emergency!!!" An "idea emergency". What a great way to attack a problem. It's so full of possibilities, so hopeful. I have a lot of "idea emergencies" right now. My biggest one is my need for a part time job that pays well, jives with my son's bus schedule, and is accomodated by my finding a babysitter that would stay with D part time (this is proving to be very difficult since babysitters want full time assignments). I have been frantically searching for babysitters, looking through job announcements, and fighting with my son's bus driver because she has yet to pick him up at the same time since school started. How am I supposed to find a job with set hours when I don't even know what time the bus is supposed to arrive? Can anyone say "idea emergency?" I am yet to find the perfect job, but in the meantime, the solution to my "idea emergency" is to calm down, take a deep breath, and wait on the Lord. That works for me.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

New Angela Davis Top

I listed this Angela Davis top in my etsy shop yesterday. Some of my friends and family members question my decision to use the image of Angela Davis in my clothing line given the controversial aura that follows her. I love this image. To me this image screams STRONG BLACK WOMAN. I don't agree with everything that she did but I do love the fact that she is not afraid to stand up for what she believes in. We need images like these, I need images like these. Images that remind us of the strength that I/we possess, of the potential that we have to confront injustice. I am not a confrontational person, by all means. I am the middle child, I am prone to keep the peace in any argument, no matter the cost. But when I see strong images of men and women who have won battles that we didn't have to fight, I can't help but feel grateful, re-charged, STRONG. That is part of what Nelesc is all about.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Recently Maternalspark.com asked readers when they felt most creative. I have been wrestling with finding more time to be creative. More and more I realize that it doesn't matter when I am most creative, if I want to accomplish anything I have to push myself during those times that I don't necessarily feel creative but have a little window of time. I am learning to work piecemeal which is hard for me, I like big bulks of time. So i cut a sleeve now, pin later, later on, i sew it, etc. It's not ideal but I recently have been accoplishing more like this instead of waiting for the kids to fall asleep. Many a times I have headed to my sewing machine bleary-eyed only to plop my head on whatever I was working on.

By the way, maternalspark.com is an amazing blog. Please go and read it, it will not disappoint.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Second attempt at reconstructed men's shirt

Okay, here's my 2nd attempt. A little better, a little looser but i do like the drama of the first one. This one is a bit too tame. I will definitley put an image on this one, will post that when it's ready. I am having a lot of fun with these so I think I am going to make a bunch of them and list them in my etsy store, http://www.nelesc.etsy.com/.

First attempt at reconstructed mens shirt

So here's my first attempt at the reconstructed men' shirt. It is still not finished. J had given me a bunch of his old shirts to work with so I have lots of practice fabric. I like it, i just wish i would have made it a bit looser, too snug in the middle but i do like it and would definitely wear it. What do you think?

Frida reconstructed men's shirt

About a year go I made this reconstructed men's shirt and screen printed Frida Kahlo on it. I recently went to the school I used to teach in and one of the teachers absolutely loved it. She asked me to make her one. So i am now on the journey to remember how I actually made the thing.

Back from long hiatus

Sorry for the long hiatus. M was home from summer school starting August 11 and I had to constantly think of trips and stuff to do to keep the kids busy. We had a good time, lots of museum, Bronx Zoo and playground trips. Then M started school and I was busy with that. But things are now getting back to normal and I am soooo ready to start sewing again. I did print on new and recycling clothes this summer and added them to my shop, http://www.nelesc.etsy.com/. I also did a couple of t-shirt recons too.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

My Friend's Art Opening tonight

Well, it has again been a while. A lot has been going on but I'll update you on that later. For now, I want to talk about the art opening I went to tonight . My friend Kirten Springer-Delgado is an artist. I met her at the Museum of the Moving Image where we lead tours together. She's a really interesting person. Although we've talked about art a lot, I've never seen her work. Mostly my fault. She is constantly inviting me to her open studios and I was never able to make it, until tonight.

Well, the minute I walked into the walkway of the studio spaces I see a big screen with images of various asses. No I don't mean donkeys, I mean human butts, right there in your face and not just with the cheeks closed, you could see the whole ass hole and everything. "Dorothy, you are not in Kansas anymore!" Or better yet, "Nellie, you are definitly not in the Children's Museum of Manhattan!" Well, although I don't love that kind of art, it did feel good that a big giant ass was welcoming me into the world of adulthood. When you have 2 young children, it's easy to get lost in the land of Never Never land, in endless Blues Clues episodes, in countless Legos buildings, in Mr. Potatohead conundrums. It was just nice to, again, be immersed in the sometimes self indulgent world of art, if just for a moment.

Kirsten's work is pretty adult. She's a photographer so she had these beautiful photos of women, some naked, some in intimate apparel, shot in bedrooms. However, they were either hidden by a wall or a door. They were very intimate and vulnerable, yet very guarded. She's also working on a series of naked men which she showed me some photos of. Her work was definitely edgy yet more subtle than what I was greeted with.

I had a great time. Even the train ride to and fro was great. I just love riding the subway, people don't get that about me. Nowadays it has become a symbol reminiscent of who I was before kids. The first time I took the subway on a consistent basis was to get to Laguardia High School of Music and Art. I then took it to go to Hunter College where I studied art history, then to my first museum job, etc. So the subway has a deep connection to my love of art. After M was born, I continued to take the train but I ended up more and more uptown, first to Queens where I worked at the Museum of the Moving Image and then to Harlem where I taught at the Studio Museum in Harlem. Right before I had D, I began working in the Bronx as a teacher and then with the birth of D, I am now home. So, as I had children, I progressively worked closer to home. So going all the way downtown today, to 14th street, was a way of reconnecting with my old self. Now don't get me wrong. It's not like my old self was a trip to Disney Land. I have grown so much since those days, I have actually transformed into a pretty insightful, interesting person. I would never give that up, not for a minute, all that I have gained today. A great husband, two wonderful kids, being able to stay home with my children, being able to rediscover my love for sewing, the insight I have now, etc. However, I do feel like I need to reconnect with her, my old self. I miss her. She's still part of me and I need to repect that and aknowledge that she once existed.

Anyway, it was great to see Kirsten. I talked to her, she introduced me to her friend who is an interior designer, we talked for a while. I then ran into a mutual friend from our museum job and we shared, I met an artist who would be perfect for my middle schoolers, if I ever decide to go back to art teaching. In total, I had a wonderful, rejuvenating time. If you are an artist, and a mom, it is imperative that you get out and look at art, talk about art, even write about art. It's urgent that you occasionally take time to recoonect to your old self, the self before kids. I came back home with so many ideas for, not only my clothing line, but for two dimensional work. I came back home feeling like an artist, a person with an opinion about art, a person, feeling like my old self.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

DIY style today and project I worked on

So first off, I got dressed quickly this morning because I realized that I had run out of milk and when I glanced at what I was wearing, I realized that it was all my own clothes, that is, I made them all. The vest is grey, i made this recently but the pants were made a while go, maybe 6 years ago, wow! That's a great feeling when your creations become so much part of you, your life. That's when I realized that I would like to sell the stuff I make, cause I like them so much, so maybe someone else would too. Oh, wait a minute the tank top underneath the vest is not mine. I did purchase it.

Also, this is what I worked on today. It's a dress made from three different t-shirts, a grey one that was given to my son but did not fit him, the blue with stripes was also given to him but didn't fit him either and the blue from the skirt was a purchased one. It is still quite unfinished. Needs some type of binding on the neck and sleeves and the back is longer than the front for some reason. It came out shorter than I wanted to so it could either be a beach dress or a tunic worn with jeans. I think I'll add a graphic and have it go towards the Nelesc line. I keep keeping the stuff I make, it's time to start creating towards the collection again. I had to take the pic while leaning back because the straps are still not attached in the back.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

My DIY Recon Style Today

Well, I am really making up for lost time. Here is a pic of what I wore today. It's all DIY (do it yourself). I found the Evita shirt in a thrift shop in Queens. It was big so I took in the sides and shortened it and cut the neck out. The pants I had from about 7 years ago. I love them so much but they were getting a hole in the knee so I cut them from the knee, added triangles in the sides and back and voila! gauchos are born.

Brown and Green Eco Dress

Here's the brown and green dress that I wrote about on June 21st. It too is part of the scraps idea I wrote about earlier. I wore it about three times already including my son's IEP meeting which went very well. I know it was God but I think the dress helped too (just kidding!) I call it the eco dress because after it was done it looked like a tree trunk with brown leaves and a lonely green leaf hanging on. Like a cry to the universe to save our planet. This is one of those times when I made something and the end result was not what I intended it to be. I do try to live green ( I do use recycled materials in my line) but I didn't begin the dress with this intent in mind. I am very happy how it turned out. I guess the dress had a message to tell.

The green was from a t-shirt my mother in law gave me, it was hers, and the brown on the bodice was scrap from a previous project. I did buy a new t-shirt for the skirt part. The browns don't match perfectly, but that's okay with me.

By the way, the pattern is also mine. I am so excited about this new patternmaking venture.

Sorry it took so long to write

Aaaahh so sorry for taking so long to write. I have had so much going on. First of all it was M's 6th birthday and we had a birthday party and all that took up some of my time. My hubby was also directing a play which filled our house with endless props. I don't know about you but when the house is cluttered like that, I can't manage to find the mental capacity to make stuff. Another thing is that this week D will get evaluated. Given our history with autism (M was diagnosed 4 years ago) we thought it was prudent to have D evaluated. He's not really talking or pointing although he is extremely relational; makes eye contact, plays peekaboo, laughs all the time, etc. I am trying not to worry but I am worrying. I will keep you posted.

But in the midst of that I did manage to finish some stuff and organize my sewing area. I decided to yake a break from making stuff for the line and make pieces for myself. This would allow me the time to practice on myself and see if there is potential to then include the designs in the line. as for organizing, I placed some of the books from my bookcases elsewhere and placed my fabrics in the bookcases so I can see them. It's an investment in my desire to make my sewing a business. I really don't know if it's possible but it's a step of faith. I also put a serger on layaway!!!!!! Another investment in my business plan. It's more than half way paid off. i overlock stitch my garments with my brother machine but i now want to up the anty and make my finishing more professional. I'll let you know when it arrives.

Anyway, here is a pic of the black and white dress that turned into a top. I am very happy with it and already wore it to church with rave reviews. This is my attempt to make pieces from scraps using my own patterns. No faces on these, this will be another facet of the line.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

I learned how to drive today

I don't know how to drive. I have never driven a car, I have never had a steering wheel in my possession. So today, after we took my niece home, my husband gets out of the car and tells me it's time that I got my first lesson. I got my permit a week ago after thinking about getting it for years. Listen, I am a subway girl, a city girl, an urban chick, I am the fifth Sex and the City girl, the city is my playground, I have a love affair with it, even from the Bronx, so why would I want a car? to drive to the city? No way. Well, I'll tell you why I now want to drive, cause I have two kids!!!! that's why!!!! lugging a six year old and a one year old in a stroller up subway stairs ain't pretty. So maybe soon I might be able to drive to central avenue with the kids, drive to my mom's house, drive to amusement parks, drive by myself somewhere, drive my husband crazy trying to pry the car away from him.

So having that steering wheel in my hand, the gas petal at my foot, was scary and exhilarating. My husband gave me nice clear directions and I went managed to drive around the block without hitting another car or killing anyone!!! i told my husband that in no time I will be driving him around while he napped. He said, "yeah sure and i'll wake up in heaven...if I make it there." He's funny. I love that about him. Well, today I drove a car. the possibilities are endless.

Here's a pic of the black/white dress

So here's the pic of the black/white/grey dress I was talking about. I like it but I think I am going to make it a blouse. The stripes are a bit overwhelming to be a dress and I think that I didn't match the stripes well. oh, by the way, this is my own pattern, I am so excited about that. I have been practicing and reading about pattern making. This is my second attempt. Anyway, will update you on this reconstruction.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Much better day yesterday

Yesterday was a much betetr day. I put D in the baby sitter (I usually do that once a week but we have not been able to afford it the past three weeks, maybe that is why I have been so gloomy) and headed out to buy some t-shirts to complete one of my reconstructed t-shirt dresses. On my way, I ran into one of my dear friends, S, who lives near my babysitter. We chatted, I vented, it was great to talk to a live person who understood what I was going through. I only stayed a second because I wanted to make the most of my 5 hours away from the baby. So I bought my t-shirts, went to the bank, stopped by the fabric store to inquire about sergers and then bought turkey meat for dinner. When i got back home, I put on one of my many 80s mixed cds, blasted the volume and vacuumed/danced for about 45 minutes fulfilling my exercise and cleaning requirements for the day.

Then it was time to sew. I managed to sew all the pieces to one dress, no finishing though. I just wanted to know what it would look like on. It was okay, needed more twekaing. This is a dress made from recycled fabric. I had previously made a maternity top that I no longer need so i took it apart to make the striped bodice. The black is made from one of my husbands discarded turtlenecks. On the brown and green dress, I managed to cut the skirt from the t-shirts but didn't attached it yet. Photos to come, i promise!!!!

So creating really upped my mood. I need to do that on a regular basis. Why do i pretend to think that if I go a while without making something, it will be okay. I was the kind of art teacher who constantly taught this concept in my classes. The need to constantly create to get better, to be better. Why don't I heed my own advice!!!!.

Another good thing that happened yesterday...one of my friends from highschool found me on my facebook account, she saw my reconstructed Frida t-shirt from my photo and requested I make her one. Maybe my facebook account will be good for business. Okay, gotta go get dressed, we are all going out to buy a new bed.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Trying to Reconstruct my Life

So yes, my blog's name is The Reconstructed Life. That is exactly what I am trying to do at this time, trying to reconstruct my life now that I have children. I am in a delicate point in my life and perhaps this is why I decided to begin this blog, a venue to organize my thoughts. I have been feeling a bit displaced. Before my first child (we'll call him M), I had a career in the arts, first in the Curatorial Department of a museum and then in an art school library. I knew that I would probably quit my job when M was born, I wasn't happy with my job and I wanted to go back to the education department of a museum and so I did, after M turned two. When M turned 4, I wanted to expand my interest in arts education and decided to work in a middle school as an art teacher. I liked it enough to want to become certified. I pursued that route as i taught and then in my second year of teaching i became pregnant with D. At this time my husband (we'll call him J) got a new, intense job and we felt that with J's crazy hours at the job, and with the issues I was having with the Board of Education (my son M has autism and it was difficult finding a placement for him, will talk more about this in future blogs) the kids needed stability and that I should take a year off from teaching. I felt comfortable with this decision. I decided I would launch my clothing line Nelesc, during this time, and pursue other creative endeavors as I mothered.

Well, D is now 15 months and M is 6 and while I launched my online shop, it has been very difficult to do my creative work. My husband's intense schedule leaves us little time to talk and also leaves me with very little options for babysiting if i decide to go out with a friend. I feel dispaced, lonely, forgotten, invisible. J says this is only for a while, that when the kids get older, I will be able to go back to work and resume more of a life but the sacrifice seems too great right now. I miss me. I miss the old me before kids. I would love to reclaim a little of that. Is that possible?

On a good note, I did manage to cut pieces to two new dresses. hopefully, tomorrow will be a good sewing day. i will post pics when i am done. Also, I went to the meat store to buy some bacon for J. The butcher asked me where I had been, that he had missed me. Okay, maybe I am not forgotten after all. God is good!

In the beginning...

Well here it goes, I am launching a blog with much fear and trepidation. I guess the need to be heard is outweighing the fear at this moment.

The blog will be musings about motherhood, the creative life, sewing, updates about my clothing line Nelesc, examples of some of my projects, etc... Enjoy!